


Misunderstandings & Oblivious idiots

by Heroine_Lestrange



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Brotp, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:47:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25846831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heroine_Lestrange/pseuds/Heroine_Lestrange
Summary: Zelena is terrible at romance, Emma is oblivious and Regina may be having a nervous breakdown due to these two idiots. Lots of misunderstandings and a focus on the Zelena and Emman Brotp.
Relationships: Emma Swan & Wicked Witch of the West | Zelena, Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan
Comments: 14
Kudos: 119





	Misunderstandings & Oblivious idiots

“Okay, you pretend to be me while I pretend to be her,” Emma explained to the red head seated in the booth opposite her.

“That makes no sense, why would I pretend to be you if you could be you and I could be her?” Zelena retorted with a roll of her eyes.

“.….what?” Emma asked, her face the picture of confusion.

“Exactly! This whole thing is idiotic, which does seem to be your default. So for the last time, you are you and I am Regina,” Zelena explained with a frustrated sigh, barely restraining herself from throwing her half eaten sand-which at the not so charming blonde.

“I guess that makes more sense. So we just role play the scenario starting now?” Emma asked, head tilted in question.

“Yes Emma, or would you prefer we wait for another year of your unrequited love to pass by so that you can mope around some more,” Zelena quipped sarcastically back at the blonde.

“Fine, I’m starting now…….like right now,” Emma weakly began.

Zelena just blankly stared at the blond.

“Okay so, Regina we’ve known each other for a few years now and we share a lot including a son and the power of magic,” Emma said, nervously fidgeting with her unused utensils.

“Stop! Please stop, this is torture. Just keep it short and simple. Do not ramble on because you know how Regina hates that,” Zelena said, holding out a hand in order to pause the blondes pathetic monologue.

“I love you and want to spend the rest of my days making you happy, I want a family with you and Henry,” Emma attempted, more confidently this time and going as far as making eye contact with Zelena as she did so. Zelena smiled at the attempt which only encouraged the blonde further.

Emma went to continue her speech but was interrupted by a strangled cough coming from above. The duo looked up only to see a wide eyed Regina staring at them.

“Hey sis, care to join us?” Zelena offered as the brunette seemed to recover from her initial surprise.

“Um, no thank you. I have urgent matters that need to be attended to this morning. Enjoy your morning Zelena, Miss Swan,” Regina nodded towards the women before quickly making her way out of the building.

“So……you think she heard any of that?” Emma asked with a slight grimace on her face.

“Probably not, if she heard that you were in love with her she would definitely have confronted you straight on. You know how weird Regina gets before her first cup of coffee,” Zelena replied with a shrug before taking a giant sip of her iced coffee.

* * *

“EMMA!” Zelena yelled as she entered the sheriff station, seeing the blonde sleeping on a stack of government documents.

“Wha…..” the blonde jerked awake at the loud noise, quickly checking her surroundings but relaxing when she noticed that it was just Zelena being her regular obnoxious self.

Zelena approached the blonde, noticing a slight glimmer on her left hand. As she made to inspect the hand the blonde jerked upwards sealing their hand together in a uncomfortable hand holding position.

“Well I’m flattered by your attention but I would really like my hand back," Zelena smirked at the rapidly reddening blonde.

“I….I can’t,” Emma stuttered, as she attempted to unseal their hands. “They’re stuck.”

“Is this some sort of magic, a trick played by an imp of some sort,” Zelena queried, looking at their joined hands in fascination.

“Nope, I’m pretty sure this is all Ruby,” Emma sighed in frustration, attempting to run her hand through her hair but getting jerked back by Zelena.

“Explain,” Zelena commanded with a raised eyebrow, all to similar to Regina.

“We’re in the middle of a prank war, I’m pretty sure she put super glue on my hand with the intention of me getting stuck to the desk or phone. I did the same thing to her last week,” Emma explained, a bit sheepish at getting caught.

“And how do we remove it? Can it be removed?” Zelena asked, slight panic creeping into her tone as she spoke.

“It’s fine, I have some stuff in the back that will take care of it,” Emma squeezed the red heads hand and smiled at her in an effort to comfort her.

“Miss Swan I have the documents that…….,” Regina trailed of as she entered into the station, spotting Emma and her sister in close proximity to one another and were they……..holding hands?

“Hey Regina, you can just put those wherever,” Emma said, smiling a goofy smile at the brunette. Zelena just rolled her eyes at the idiots in love giving one another doe eyes as if she wasn’t right there.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, I need to go,” Regina said flustered, looking everywhere but at the two women and their joined hands.

“She’s being really weird lately,” Zelena said with the shake of her head as she watched the brunette witch leave.

“You noticed that too? I thought I was just being paranoid. Do you think she knows about my feelings?” Emma asked.

“My sister is oblivious to any and all romantic prospects. Trust me, she has no idea so you have plenty of time to man up and admit your feelings,” Zelena encouraged with a nudge to the shoulder. “Now as touching as this all is can we please get unstuck.”

* * *

“I hate this place, tell me how you convinced me to come again,” Zelena said glaring at the garish interior of the Rabbit Hole.

“Ruby, scantily clad, hopefully tipsy enough to give you the time of day?” Emma quipped, sipping her beer as she motioned to the leggy brunette in question.

“I don’t need her to be tipsy, have you seen me,” Zelena smirked, motioning towards her body clad in a green blouse and tight black pants.

“Your looks aren't the problem, your personality however is an acquired taste,” Emma retorted.

“You like me,” Zelena said, stealing the blondes drink.

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for the Mills women charm,” Emma said, attempting to steal her beer back. When she failed yet again she opted to give in and motioned the bartender for another.

“Mm I bet you loved mother then,” Zelena smirked, raising her eyebrow in challenge.

“Oh most definitely, the ability to effectively torture is something I love in a woman,” Emma joked, laughing at the giggle released by Zelena.

The bartender placed the beer in front of Emma just as the party next to her jostled forward spilling the drink all over the front of Zelena’s green blouse.

“Oh shit,” Emma exclaimed before attempting to dry the shirt with the napkins on the bar. When that didn’t work she took the older woman’s arm and lead her to the bathroom in the back.

“I’m so sorry,” Emma apologized, running her hands through her hair in effort to fin a solution in fixing Zelena’s clearly ruined blouse.

“It’s fine,” Zelena waved the worry off. “Not your fault, I guess I’ll just have to call it a night and head back early.”

“No way! We just got here. You can have my shirt since I have a jacket,” Emma said, not waiting for an answer as she stripped out of her jacket and began removing her shirt. Zelena just sighed fondly and followed suit.

As Emma went to hand Zelena the shirt the bathroom door creaked open. Regina made her way into the bathroom before abruptly stopping at the sight of the two bra clad women in front of her.

Regina’s face turned a deep shade of crimson as she released a high pitched squeak before disappearing in a cloud of deep purple smoke.

“Should we be worried?” Emma asked as she put on her jacket.

“No, I think Regina’s just going through a phase or something but if it keeps happening we should probably notify Archie,” Zelena replied as she pulled Emma’s shirt over her head. “Do you want to go check on her?”

“We can go over there tomorrow. Tonight you are getting out there and asking Ruby to dance,” Emma cheered, in an effort to pump the redhead up.

“Lets do this,” Zelena answered in kind. “But first, shots!”

* * *

“REGINA!” Zelena bellowed as she strode into the mayors house, the blonde savior trailing closely behind her.

“Would it kill either one of you to knock,” Regina sighed, as they entered the kitchen where the brunette was leaning against the counter with a half filled glass of wine.

“We need to talk to you,” Emma said, attempting to be gentle with the often volatile brunette.

“I already know,” Regina answered sadly.

“And…?” Zelena pried.

“I can’t say that I ever saw this coming but I care for you both and I will support your relationship, no matter what form it may take,” Regina elaborated, her tone resigned and her eyes glazed.

“Is this a stroke? Are you having a stroke? What is this?” Zelena baffled turned towards Emma for answers. Emma just shrugged in confusion.

“I know about your relationship, that you two are in love,” Regina answered, on the verge of tears.

“Ew what? Take that back!” Zelena exclaimed in disgust.

“Really? Really Zelena? I'm not that bad,” Emma huffed, annoyed with the redheads apparent disgust.

“You’re like my sister Emma,” Zelena retorted.

“What?” Regina watched the banter with confusion. “What about the diner, you confessed your love for each other.”

“It was role play,” Zelena explained. “100% not real.”

“You were holding hands in the station,” Regina said exasperated.

“That was just a Ruby prank gone wrong,” Emma replied, with a slight grin and hands palm up.

“You were half naked in the Rabbit Hole bathroom last night, close to each other. She was holding your shirt,” Regina said pointing at Zelena, no longer attempting to hold back her emotions or tears.

“She spilled her drink on me and loaned me her shirt,” Zelena said in an attempt to placate Regina.

“These excuses are ridiculous! Just tell me the truth,” Regina was reaching a state that was frantic.

“Regina……I love you. Zelena was helping me come to terms with telling you and we just became friends. Its you I want to be with, its always been you,” Emma said softly, making her way to Regina and gently swiping the stray tears away.

“And I went home with Ruby last night so……..” Zelena proudly added before accepting the high five Emma offered behind her back.

“I saw that,” Regina grinned through the remaining tears before moving into Emma and kissing her soundly.

“I’m still here,” Zelena said as the other two continued to kiss in front of her. “Seriously? I left Ruby’s bed for this?”

* * *


End file.
